Love Is Real

I never really understood what love was...
I had heard 1Cor 13:4 before but to me it just wasn't 'clicking'.. In growing up I had a hard time expressing love.. I couldn't even tell my mom "Love you too" when getting off the phone... When I met my husband and he began saying 'I love you' I never said it back. Of course he felt confused 'cause he wasn't sure how I felt... I didn't know how to express love.

   When we began coming to church, people would say 'I love you' all the time! In my mind, I was like 'How can they say that?? They don't even know me!!!' But love isn't conditional, its not "oh I know you, your worthy of love".. I couldn't understand that you could genuinely love a stranger.. that was unfathomable to me. Jn 4:8 (amp), "He who does not love has not become acquainted with God [does not and never did know Him], for God is love."
 
   Since I didn't understand love, it was hard for me to understand that God really loved me & I was worthy of love. I think most of us probably have 'twisted' sense of love and what that is. I had a hard time understand the concept 'God is love', what does that mean?! I couldn't wrap my mind around it. Its ultimately, everything God is, His actions, everything He did, everything He stood for is Love..

  In turn, since I had a 'warped' sense of love I couldn't fully express love to my husband OR my kids... I had been hurt SO much it was hard for me to open myself, its vulnerability. I admit, at times I still have a hard time just loving on my kids. Its not that I don't love them but I wasn't 'loved on' a lot growing up therefore for me its a learned behavioral pattern. I want to be a loving person, physically towards my family but its starts with me. Most of the time I have to conscientiously make a point to love on my kids. I'm trying my best to break this cycle. I've learned too, its OK to be vulnerable sometimes. People are gonna hurt you and a lot of times its not intentional but we all receive differently and depending on the season your in depends on how you receive what people will say to you and their actions towards you.

   

Love is in everything. Love is all around us. Love is everywhere. Your actions, your words reflect love.... Fore what overflows outta your will come out your mouth..